Speaking The Language

Sometimes I don’t feel like I’m even speaking the same language as the rest of the world. Have you ever felt this? When you are saying something and people look at you with blank eyes, like you are speaking your own made up words. I feel like I am often in this fog that is pulling me deeper into its clutches. At times amazes me that anything I do or say forms any sort of cohesion, let alone that I accomplish daily tasks.

Mental illness has wreaked havoc on our family this year. Although I am unable to share details at this time, I can tell you that it has been a very hard five months! With myself, as well as two teenagers (add puberty and hormones) whom all have one form or another of mental illness, and voila you have mayhem. And hubby, well, he is just trying to stear this crazy train!


So, what do we do to get through this time in our lives? The best we can, I suppose. There is counseling and medicine, but also lots of listening and supporting. Learning coping skills and how to take care of mind, but also body. (Keep an eye out for a piece in the future on how we take care of our mind and body.) Some days we just chill (thank God for homeschool and flexibility) and other days we can only do our best to push through. Sometimes the sounding board for the kids and other times the warm embrace. There are nights when the four of us all sit on our queen size bed and just talk about how tough things are right now, other times no talking occurs and perhaps a tear or two is shed.

I never had to cope with my depression as a teenager. I didn’t begin my struggle until I was twenty. I cannot even imagine the difficulty of navigating an already stressful and confusing time of life, then adding depression and anxiety into the mix! But, I see the strength and determination that has taken root in my children’s lives. I believe in them and their abilities. And, at times I find myself thanking God for giving me depression, just so that I can be empathetic and understanding of my kids and the struggles they face. Ultimately, I know that we have got this!

May is Mental Illnes Month. If you or someone you know battles mental illness, there are many great resources here

My articles:
Life With Anxiety
Dear Agony-depression
Breaking Free
After The Storm

Your prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “language.”  #SoCS


Filed under Depression, Family, Life Lessons

23 responses to “Speaking The Language

  1. Coyote from Orion

    Several decades and I never got a mug, pen, or calendar that my slavery to their brands gave other people great lives. When I started pointing it out they started trying to goad me into behaviour that could get me committed again. They were already paving the road to say I had not been complient in taking the product and following their orders as I had actually begged them for help in trust. The excessive physical side effects only supported on of their contradictions. Maybe they would have felt better if they took it. Maybe we would have felt better if they took it. I suggested this to them when I still had a brother and the jabbed me with largactyl. Apparently it’s against international standards to use now
    Funny how meditation works.
    Some people must hate that us meditating won’t keep them rich unless they get some callous on their hands

    • I do agree the pharmaceutical companies have made a huge profit in the wake of an explosion in mental illness. And while I don’t feel it is always necessary and certainly many other things work, I do know for some it is the only way to get the mind to function with the proper chemical balance. Each person must choose for themselves.

      • Coyote from Orion

        Some of us have made massives sacrifices so people with mild mental illnesses or even criminal behavior can take short courses of fashionable product.

  2. Living with depression and mental illness is always challenging. All of us will go through challenging times, but with mental illness it can be much harder. Depression got really bad for me last year and I had to seek help from a therapist. It was the best thing ever, being able to talk about what I was feeling out lout without being judged.

    Those chats on the queen sized bed sound therapeutic for you. Just sitting there and admitting what it is, and then trying to move along and move forward. I like how you are being positive about this, that you are recognising the strengths in those around you. All of us are strong in our own ways, and with time we will each realise that 🙂

    • Thank you so much for your comment. It is good to know that we are not alone. Yes, those times as a family do tend to be our very own therapy sessions. I am so grateful that I have the type of relationship that they feel they can open up with me about their struggles.
      I try to remain as possitive as I can. Believe me, I am human and there are days I would like to stay in bed. But, I also want to be a good influence in the lives of my kids and show them that we can be anything we want while battling!
      Be well and thanks again for sharing your struggle too! xx

  3. geminilvr

    Hugs to you girl – thank you being a strong voice on this subject and sharing your personal story with us.

  4. Oliver Wright

    It’s hard to try to educate certain people on mental health topics. Some of them just have no clue.

    My girlfriend is currently having a rough bout with anxiety and depression. I recently lost my job, so I’m trying to keep my head together – to stay strong for her. I’ve been down the road she has, and she has told me she wants professional help. I’m trying to get her in the right direction now.

    • It is good that she has you to help her. I find empathy is so much better then sympathy. I hope that you both find strength in each other as you journey in this life. Thank you for reading and commenting.

  5. A good bit of writing. I didn’t use drugs during my depression (not saying it is wrong) as the psych who was seeing me said he thot I could avoid them — and gave me some things to help. One was a strenuous walk. The other was to stop being a vegetarian for a bit, and eat grounding foods. Both actually helped, especially the vigorous walk. It is so hard. Huggs.

    • Yes, I agree medication is certainly not always the answer. And I do want to write a piece about how other things have aided me and my children in our journey. I am very much and advocate of going as natural as you are able. Thank you for reading and your comment. Be well. xx

  6. Coyote from Orion

    The appropriate medication is often life saving. My issue is how doctors mix between public and private systems for the mighty dollar recruiting for ‘research’. Nazi Germany scientists and doctors would be jealous of our political structure and legislation now. Meanwhile normal people laugh at what could be happening in the same train carriage as them.

  7. I never feel lonely and empty when I am alone. I feel cut off among most people. Because they speak a different “language”. That’s every time really hard. It’s a gift that you have your children and that you have the chance to feel understanding and emphathie!

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