I need a reprieve from life, as a mother and a wife
Things are tough and just so damn rough
Slow down, smell a rose or touch sand with my toes
Or see a sunset as tears make my face wet
Alas I am a mom and wife, for this indeed is my life
So I go on with my days, for them always
First to be as they need, while insides beg and pleed
Can such selfishness hold any happiness?
Along the way I decided to be all of me, undivided
Giving in to what I feel, helps me to heal
It’s okay to have these times, we need to sometimes
I found to be content, I will need to vent
If you’re a spouse or a parent, no need to feel errant
Don’t allow guilt when life makes you wilt
Connect with emotions each day as you find the way
The strength is in you, to yourself be true©
Helping our children through the struggles of depression has been the hardest task that we as parents have ever encountered. Not only have we broached the most difficult of times, we have faced thee unthinkable. I never knew the true meaning of the word “helpless” until this journey began.
Some things that we have been using to help counteract this illness have been counseling, with cognitive therapy, and yes, even medicine. (Medicine was not our first choice, but was necessary in the end, to battle the chemical imbalances.) We have also been using exercise, healthy eating, vitamins, probiotics and even yoga. Studies prove the body and digestive system are closely tied to the brain and chemicals there.
It is also very important to have a “game plan” when the down times occur. Even I have talked about what I do here. It is really no different for my kids. We must have things in place that they can do to bring enjoyment into their days, if only for a moment. My oldest likes building electromagnets, weight lifting, crocheting and video games. My youngest prefers crafting, art and drawing, along with the outdoors and biking. This does not mean the struggles don’t still reek havoc, but these counter measures can and do help. Teaching coping skills is vital to surviving this disease!
The biggest commodity to me in this illness, however, has been my own personal experiences. I have said before, empathy is so much different from sympathy. Being able to connect with my two teens by understanding and relating, is priceless. We communicate frequently and they are usually quite open with me. Does it make things easier? Not always! But, it does help them to know they are not alone is this battle. And being able to knowledgeably advocate for them is a blessing.
May is Mental Illness Month. If you or someone you know battles mental illness, there are many great resources here. Also read my piece Speaking The Language which talks more about this journey with my family.
Mental Illness May #1
Life With Anxiety
After The Storm
The love of a child is the best feeling
Coming to mom when they need healing
With opened arms taking them in an embrace
Remember the day you first looked on their face
The need that they have, to know you’re their mom
All of the firsts, a roll and a crawl, a hand in your palm
With tears in your eyes or wiping away some of theirs too
But most of all, it’s the best, the first time they say “I love you”©
Happy Mother’s Day to all of those who have the honor of being a mom!
Sometimes I don’t feel like I’m even speaking the same language as the rest of the world. Have you ever felt this? When you are saying something and people look at you with blank eyes, like you are speaking your own made up words. I feel like I am often in this fog that is pulling me deeper into its clutches. At times amazes me that anything I do or say forms any sort of cohesion, let alone that I accomplish daily tasks.
Mental illness has wreaked havoc on our family this year. Although I am unable to share details at this time, I can tell you that it has been a very hard five months! With myself, as well as two teenagers (add puberty and hormones) whom all have one form or another of mental illness, and voila you have mayhem. And hubby, well, he is just trying to stear this crazy train!
So, what do we do to get through this time in our lives? The best we can, I suppose. There is counseling and medicine, but also lots of listening and supporting. Learning coping skills and how to take care of mind, but also body. (Keep an eye out for a piece in the future on how we take care of our mind and body.) Some days we just chill (thank God for homeschool and flexibility) and other days we can only do our best to push through. Sometimes the sounding board for the kids and other times the warm embrace. There are nights when the four of us all sit on our queen size bed and just talk about how tough things are right now, other times no talking occurs and perhaps a tear or two is shed.
I never had to cope with my depression as a teenager. I didn’t begin my struggle until I was twenty. I cannot even imagine the difficulty of navigating an already stressful and confusing time of life, then adding depression and anxiety into the mix! But, I see the strength and determination that has taken root in my children’s lives. I believe in them and their abilities. And, at times I find myself thanking God for giving me depression, just so that I can be empathetic and understanding of my kids and the struggles they face. Ultimately, I know that we have got this!
May is Mental Illnes Month. If you or someone you know battles mental illness, there are many great resources here.
Life With Anxiety
After The Storm
Your prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “language.” #SoCS
“Your prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “any.” Begin your post with the word “any.” Bonus points if you theme your post on another word that starts with “A.” Have fun!”
Any idea how we got to April so quickly? I cannot believe that we are already a quarter of the way through the year! The kids only have about six more weeks of school. As we approach the summer I am attempting to make some plans. I do not want to hear the “b” word from them, you know the one, bored. Oldest has been told he needs to apply for a job this summer. At sixteen the time has arrived for him to join the work force. Youngest is turning fourteen next month. She has a new affinity with turtles. We found a sea turtle aquarium a few hours north from us, which we will visit for her birthday. All-in-all life continues to move at an allarming pace. The kids grow, we work and amazingly we are celebrating our two year anniversary at the beach in a few months!
Happy Saturday Y’all!
I have often explained before
But I can tell you this once more
“What is my power?” Many inquire
I can’t fly or out of my eyes shoot fire
I’m not much for kicking bad guy’s butts
In fact, don’t even like to save old ugly mutts
Won’t come to your rescue at the drop of a hat
I can find bargains, not sure you meant that
My name is not man, like a Bat or Super
That’s cause I’m not a him but a her
Call me a lady I’ll make no qualm
My power however, I am Mom©
To all the women out there, whether a mom or not,
celebrating you and the strengths that you have! xx
Filed under Family, poetry
Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “how.” Start your post with the word “How.” Bonus points if you end with it too.
How did life get so complicated? I would love to go back to a time when all I had to worry about was school grades, what to wear and what to eat for breakfast. Now, here I am married, with two teenagers of my own and the responcibility’s list goes on. I have a million thoughts running through my mind constantly. Yesterday, at one point, I literally could not focus on one thing at a time, and was running around like a mad woman. Well, some would say “mad woman,” while others would just say, mom. Is it any wonder though that I am losing my mind? Really, the pressures of life get higher as does my age! Sometimes I think that I would like to fane crazy just to get a holiday in a hospital (okay, maybe that’s taking it a bit too far, but I know some of you get me)!
Now, I need to go get ready for work, which happens to be my respite from the complications, some how. ~Mac