How could I not giggle when finding out the word of the day is “knackered.”
For all my UK and Aussie friends, this one’s for you.
I ran into this guy so daft tried to give him the shaft
Bloody hell what a duff, but he thought he was tough
Dodgiest mate I’d ever seen, except, maybe the queen
What an undeniable arse, perhaps this was just a farce
But then my fanny he tried to touch, that was too much
What a cock-up he did make, indeed was a huge mistake
Off his trolley I think somewhat, but I’m giving him a nut
Didn’t know how to react, he was in fact quite gobsmacked
Said, “Bugger off you prat!” and he was finally gone with that
Was knackered after his thrashing, but hey, I still look smashing
All Rights Reserved©
There once was a cranky cow because the farmer had called her a sow
With determination she said, “moo” translated means “I don’t like you”
Well the pig got very upset, couldn’t understand what the farmer ment
The heifer was as big as horse, for goodness sake, didn’t “oink” of course
Now the horse heard gossip from the hen, what’d been said in the pig pen
This perturbed him lots, comparing a stallion to cattle that have big spots
The family dog heard the “neigh” of the steed and this angered him indeed
For Spot believed himself a dalmation, to indeed have an amazing vocation
Then the rooster heard “bark” from the pup, thinking it was time to get up
He crowed quite loudly, wanting to prove his great importance so proudly
Seeing the sun had not yet arose, the farmer in anger was quick on his toes
Yelling as he marched out, said, “be quiet!” as he tapped the pig on the snout
So the moral of the story is as such, don’t listen to what others say too much
Especially a story about a man who can’t tell between a chicken and a ham©
In Responce to SoCS: Our prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “moo.” Base your post on the word “moo” or a word that rhymes with it. Bonus points if you actually use the word “moo” in your post.
Filed under humor, poetry
To: Whomever invented glitter, you suck! From: The moms that have had the duty of trying to clean that crap out of EVERYTHING!
Okay, who thought putting clitter on gift wrap of any kind was a good idea? I mean, have you ever found yourself glitter”ized” by the time you finished wrapping a gift? Running out of the house because you’re late to a birthday party; only to arrive looking like a stripper mom! Not cool man. Although, likely you are not the only one there, it’s actually like a stripper reunion.
Then you have those that believe crafting with glitter is an AMAZING idea! They enjoy sending your child home from a party or school with glittered “art”! WTH, that is NOT art! That is a glitter bomb waiting to explode all over my house! One that will permeate every orifice of living space and my child’s body.
Finally, what is with the glitter in EVERY woman’s product? Nails, makeup, lotions, body sprays, let alone the clothing. Again, if I wanted to look like a slu… well you get my point! PLEASE, stop putting glitter on and in everything; if we were meant to poop glitter we would all be unicorns!©